Frances Ellen Speaks!

Archive for August, 2008

My mother would say to me,”Don’t spray cologne on your neck.”

Here’s her rationale. The skin under your chin, the “front” of your neck, is thin, delicate skin. It is one of the first places where people show their age. Since the first ingredient in cologne is alcohol, this is NOT a good thing to spray on your neck year after year after year. Her advice–spritz a little to the “back” of your neck, your wrists and the inside of your elbows.

This was another of her favorites.  ”Is there any reason why you have to look in the mirror at yourself while you brush your teeth?”

At the time, this seemed a little peevish to me, but I wasn’t the one cleaning off the tiny specks of dried toothpaste off the mirror. I am now. I don’t look into the mirror while brushing anymore.

Here’s another. “Always make sure you have money in your purse.”

Notice she didn’t say a “dime” (which way back when, that’s how much it cost to make a phone call in case of an emergency). She meant “real” money. To this day, I never leave the house with less than $10.00. And I have experienced my share of little emergencies when I was glad I had that money with me. Especially one night after midnight, when I got a flat tire and a good samaritan stopped and changed it for me. I forced that $10.00 on him, he didn’t want to take it, but I had it to give, and at 1:00 a.m. in the morning, I wished it could’ve been more.

She had some kooky ones, too. “Always make your bed in the morning.”

This had to do with one of her many “what if” scenarios. What if you went to work and there was a fire, (The firemen would see my unmade bed?) or what if you forgot something at home and had to send someone to your house to fetch it for you. (They would look through my house mainly to see if my bed was made?) Believe me, she had several more freaky reasons why my bed should me made, but I think she just liked the idea of a home that was always in order. This was her way of scaring me into being orderly.

Evidently, she was not alone with this last piece of motherly advice. I have friends whose mothers told them the same thing. ”Always wear clean underwear.”

I will spare you the “what if” scenarios that go along with this one.

Many people recall insightful advice they’ve received from a parent. The young mother over at Verlanderville remembers an admonition from her mother.

Growing up, my mother told us that we were not allowed to use the word hate for things like vegetables, songs, people, etc.  She said that it was a very strong word and that we should only use it for things like sin, injustice, math, etc.

Clearly, dads can give good advice, too. See Mom & A Microphone

It was my 7-year-old’s first flag football game of the season. I was secretly dreading it, since my mother and father were always sitting on the sidelines at Griffin’s games, cheering him on. This year, Dad wouldn’t be there. Dad was Griffin’s biggest fan. Last season, when I expressed concern that I “wasn’t sure this was his strongest sport,” Dad told me, “be patient. He’ll get better with time.” And just like all the other advice my father has given me, he was right.

Makes you smile, doesn’t it?

1. Don’t throw those leftover veggies in the garbage. Save them in a large container in the freezer. Keep adding to it. Leftover beef and chicken can be collected in the same container. Chop meat into cubes before adding. When the container is full, dump it into a pot of broth (chicken, beef or vegetable). Better still use some low-sodium bouillon cubes. It’s such a healthy meal, you don’t have to feel guilty about serving it with a big loaf of Italian or French bread.
2. Before you write a single word on your weekly menu-planning list, (You do make a list, don’t you?) check the refrigerator for leftovers. Use the leftovers. Be honest. How many times have you forgotten about them and ended up throwing them away? You will now vow to never to that again!
3. At the beginning of every week, make your menu list. What exactly are you planning to have for lunch and dinner during the coming week? You’ve already checked the frig, right? Now it’s time to look in the freezer. That’s your starting point. Build a meal around something you already have in the freezer. If it’s meat, all you’ll need are the veggies to go with it. If you have a bag of frozen veggies, decide what meat or fish you will prepare. Or be a vegetarian for a night.
4. While you decide what will be on your menu planner, you need to have a second list right alongside it. This list is your grocery list. (Maybe you already have one started. I tend to write things down as I use the last one during the week, i.e. eggs, milk, cereal) List everything you will need at the supermarket to complete the meals you are planning to prepare for the coming week. When you walk into the supermarket–stick to the list. You’ll be surprised how much money you’ll save when you enter the store armed with a plan.
5. If you shop once a week, try shopping every other week. Actually, someone told me to try this, but I didn’t think it would save me any money. Surprise, surprise. It did. I’m not sure how or why, because my bi-weekly shopping list was a whole lot longer than my weekly list, but at the end of the month, I had saved approximately $40.00. I am a family of one, so that’s pretty darn good. [Caution: If you try this, make sure you have enough food in the house to last for two weeks. That's the tricky part.]
6. Finally, don’t forget about pasta. It’s inexpensive and filling. When I was growing up, Sunday was always Pasta Day. The beauty of Pasta Day is that there are all kinds of shapes and sizes of pasta to choose from, so it feels like a new meal every week. Switch it out every week: ziti, rigatoni, spaghetti, penne, to name a few. The added bonus–pasta is quick and easy to prepare. [Hint: After draining your pasta in a collander, do not rinse it with water. The outer layer of starch on the pasta is what makes the sauce stick to it. If you rinse--the sauce slides off.]

So, there you have it. Six suggestions–give them a try.

I’m open to any and all suggestions on saving money, so let me know if you have any.

image from

Last Saturday afternoon, as I was getting ready to walk home from my friend Bev’s house, the clouds shuddered and an unexpected shower of rain began pelting the windows. It sounded good to me. It sounded like bad timing to Bev.

Her immediate thoughts were: maybe I should wait until the rain stopped, or slowed down, or I should, at least, borrow an umbrella, or…

But I was thinking, I couldn’t remember the last time I walked in the rain. So, I pooh, poohed the offer of an umbrella and ventured outside. It was a hot day. The rain felt cool. I noticed steam rising from the ground, as the earth drank its full. Huge drops of rain cascaded down from my head. There was no lightning, no thunder–a perfect day for a stroll. I looked up at the sky as I walked and drops of water splattered onto my face. By the time, I reached my front door, I was soaked to the skin. I stepped inside and dropped my clothes.

Spontaneity had surprised me and gifted me with a glorious, divine, magnificent interlude!

From the news stan(d)

Someone’s said that “spontaneity is the quality of being able to do something just because you feel like it at the moment, of trusting your instincts, of taking yourself by surprise…

You don’t think about being spontaneous, you just do it. It comes from within you to do what you like, how you like it and when you want it. It just happens – unplanned, unstructured and best of all, unexpected but still within your power to shape it.

The Cook Family seems to know how to be spontaneous.

The other day Dan got home from work just in time to catch the sun going down . The second he came through the door he said, “grab a blanket, we’re going on the roof.”

This idea tickled me – Manufactured Spontaneity

At Flax, the art supply store, you can buy a notebook with napkins instead of pages. Because so many great ideas started on a napkin. So. You should be ready with some napkins.

Spontaneity–it comes in all sizes.

What about you? Spontaneous or Well Planned Agenda?

08/08/08 A propitious day in China, believed to bring prosperity, and to China’s utter delight, an opportunity to perform for the world–The Olympic Opening Ceremony.

For as long as I can remember, I have loved watching the Olympics. Of course, I enjoy the competitions, but I try real hard to see the Opening Ceremonies. Usually, they are extraordinary, spectacular extravaganzas. And this year, China did not disappoint. Their ceremony left me breathless at times, at other times awed by the precision of the 15,000 people who performed and created one of the most memorable Opening Ceremonies I have ever seen.

The Parade of Nations always makes my eyes water. The magnitude of so many countries coming together, despite their political differences, gives me hope for humanity. When the torch was finally lit, I was emotionally drained.

I’m not alone in my admiration for the spirit of the games. Fitness Diva also loved the Opening.

 I hope that you all got to watch China present the opening ceremonies of the 2008 Beijing Olympics last night or this morning. I have to say, without a doubt, China ROCKED IT!!! I have watched all the Olympics since I was old enough to know what they were, and China’s incredibly spectacular display of pyrotechnics, performance, and purely awe inspiring displays was off the charts. Never has an opening ceremony been as monumentally opulent and magnificent.

See what I mean? When you love them, you really, really love them.

To see some marvelous photos, go to fash eccentric.

Enjoy.

Every once in a while, I feel the necessity to encourage people to write and record a memory or two. I often suggest this to friends and I receive a variety of responses:
“I’m not a writer.”
“Nothing interesting has happened in my life.”
“No one would be interested in reading anything I could write.”
“I’m uncomfortable revealing incidents from my life.”
“I don’t have the time.”
“I wouldn’t know what to write about.”

I have answers for each of the above. If you know how to talk, you know how to write. Everyone has something interesting and insightful to document for family members to read sometime in the future. And it doesn’t have to be anything too personal. As to having time–if you have time to read or watch television, you can steal a half hour to write. And what to write? Write about anything you think your children or grandchildren might like to know about you. For instance:
Where did you meet your spouse?
When was your first kiss? With who?
What were your parents like?
Tell about your favorite vacation.
What country would you visit if you could?

 Remembering is a good thing. I’m not the only one who thinks so.

This from an article in O Magazine 

Writing memoir is a way to figure out who you used to be and how you got to be who you are.

From Barefoottech in Australia

“When my Father was dying of cancer he started to write about his life. I longed for him to be able to record all of his experiences. Sadly, he only wrote a fraction of it, but I treasure to this day the bit he did accomplish. However, there is so much I wish I could ask, and can’t. Now I’m older I want to know more.”

Whatever memories or knowledge you may have, write them down. Her grandfather was a brilliant gardener, but unfortunately none of his tips were passed on.

In the July/August issue of the AARP magazine, there is an excellent article about memoirs, Everyone Has a Story to Tell. I agree.

Is there any reason why you can’t go out and buy a notebook? If it’s sitting on a table or a desk, maybe you’ll be moved to write something in it.