Frances Ellen Speaks!

Archive for the ‘Diary’ Category

About a week ago, I sent an email out to several friends asking them to share a favorite childhood memory with me. Many of those who replied were the same people who have been telling me they can’t write.

If you’ve been reading my blog for a while, you know I strongly feel everyone should be writing something –anything– so that the only thing one leaves behind isn’t just ashes. What would be the point of your being here if that’s all you leave?

Don’t even think about keeping a diary. Because you probably won’t. However, having a notebook sitting on an end table, a pretty one with flowers or something on the cover, might be just the thing. If it’s there, maybe you’ll write in it once in a while. I guarantee someone from the future will thank you for it.

From time to time, I’ll show some of the responses I received to my question. The ones I’ve chosen to share today probably took a mere five minutes (if that) for the respondents to write.

Here’s one from Judy H. It’s only two sentences long, but it says a lot about how kids entertained themselves before computers, and about the lack of crime in our neighborhoods.

I think my favorite childhood memories were playing games in the street – like “giant step” and neighborhood games like “Cops and Robbers”. Those were the days when you could run around the neighborhood without being afraid.

This one is from Judy C. Again, very few sentences. This one is a whopping three sentences. Who knew before there were Good Humor trucks, there were Good Humor bikes?

Let’s, see, I think it would be when my grandfather was a VP with Good Humor. I used to visit the warehouse where all the Good Humor Ice Cream bicycles were kept and riding them around the warehouse, not to mention eating the Good Humor ice cream birthday cakes he used to have made for me. Wow, that was a looooooooooooonng time ago!!

It doesn’t get much more succinct than this from Denise O.

When my sister ;o) got me Tony the Pony
>Xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox LOVE THAT TONY!!!

For the record, Denise is my sister and I bought the Tony the Pony for her birthday when she was four or five years old. Tony is a legend in our family. But who would know the story of Tony if we didn’t write about him?

Trust me, you need to buy yourself a notebook.

image from

Last Saturday afternoon, as I was getting ready to walk home from my friend Bev’s house, the clouds shuddered and an unexpected shower of rain began pelting the windows. It sounded good to me. It sounded like bad timing to Bev.

Her immediate thoughts were: maybe I should wait until the rain stopped, or slowed down, or I should, at least, borrow an umbrella, or…

But I was thinking, I couldn’t remember the last time I walked in the rain. So, I pooh, poohed the offer of an umbrella and ventured outside. It was a hot day. The rain felt cool. I noticed steam rising from the ground, as the earth drank its full. Huge drops of rain cascaded down from my head. There was no lightning, no thunder–a perfect day for a stroll. I looked up at the sky as I walked and drops of water splattered onto my face. By the time, I reached my front door, I was soaked to the skin. I stepped inside and dropped my clothes.

Spontaneity had surprised me and gifted me with a glorious, divine, magnificent interlude!

From the news stan(d)

Someone’s said that “spontaneity is the quality of being able to do something just because you feel like it at the moment, of trusting your instincts, of taking yourself by surprise…

You don’t think about being spontaneous, you just do it. It comes from within you to do what you like, how you like it and when you want it. It just happens – unplanned, unstructured and best of all, unexpected but still within your power to shape it.

The Cook Family seems to know how to be spontaneous.

The other day Dan got home from work just in time to catch the sun going down . The second he came through the door he said, “grab a blanket, we’re going on the roof.”

This idea tickled me – Manufactured Spontaneity

At Flax, the art supply store, you can buy a notebook with napkins instead of pages. Because so many great ideas started on a napkin. So. You should be ready with some napkins.

Spontaneity–it comes in all sizes.

What about you? Spontaneous or Well Planned Agenda?

Every once in a while, I feel the necessity to encourage people to write and record a memory or two. I often suggest this to friends and I receive a variety of responses:
“I’m not a writer.”
“Nothing interesting has happened in my life.”
“No one would be interested in reading anything I could write.”
“I’m uncomfortable revealing incidents from my life.”
“I don’t have the time.”
“I wouldn’t know what to write about.”

I have answers for each of the above. If you know how to talk, you know how to write. Everyone has something interesting and insightful to document for family members to read sometime in the future. And it doesn’t have to be anything too personal. As to having time–if you have time to read or watch television, you can steal a half hour to write. And what to write? Write about anything you think your children or grandchildren might like to know about you. For instance:
Where did you meet your spouse?
When was your first kiss? With who?
What were your parents like?
Tell about your favorite vacation.
What country would you visit if you could?

 Remembering is a good thing. I’m not the only one who thinks so.

This from an article in O Magazine 

Writing memoir is a way to figure out who you used to be and how you got to be who you are.

From Barefoottech in Australia

“When my Father was dying of cancer he started to write about his life. I longed for him to be able to record all of his experiences. Sadly, he only wrote a fraction of it, but I treasure to this day the bit he did accomplish. However, there is so much I wish I could ask, and can’t. Now I’m older I want to know more.”

Whatever memories or knowledge you may have, write them down. Her grandfather was a brilliant gardener, but unfortunately none of his tips were passed on.

In the July/August issue of the AARP magazine, there is an excellent article about memoirs, Everyone Has a Story to Tell. I agree.

Is there any reason why you can’t go out and buy a notebook? If it’s sitting on a table or a desk, maybe you’ll be moved to write something in it.

Since I wrote all about things that I love last week, it seems only fair that I write about a few things I hated in the 80’s and still hate in 2008. As in my previous post, some of the things on my old list are outdated. For instance, back then I hated “window envelopes.” I don’t have a problem with them anymore because I pay the majority of my bills online. I also didn’t like to “clean the oven,” and thank goodness that has changed. I have a self-cleaning oven.

Following are still problem areas–things that I hate:

Toilet paper installed backward on the dispenser
Stupid TV commercials
Guests that arrive late for a sit-down dinner
Any kind of cruelty or abuse
Mixing ground beef with my hands (yuk!)
Golf (Sorry, golfers, but I just don’t get it.)
Hate when my feet are cold
Polkas
Advertising cards stuck inside a magazine
Bugs, mice and snakes

Well, that’s it for me. If you need to vent, send me your list.

Years ago, and I’m talking back in the early 80’s, I made two lists. One was titled “Things I Love” and the other was “Things I Hate.” Why would I do that? I have no idea. Maybe just because I love to make lists. I’m a list-maker, okay?

Anyway, I came across these lists a few days ago and I read the “love list” to see if I had changed much over the years. Except for “E.T.” (I guess I had recently gone to the movies to see that), and my favorite name at that time, “Leeanne” (which I have gotten over) and “jukeboxes,” (where did all the jukeboxes go?), there weren’t too many differences.

Perhaps the “ziploc bag” had recently been introduced, because it made my list. And it appears I actually had time to do “crossword puzzles,” “jigsaw puzzles” and to play “Scrabble.” Just when I got to reminiscing about how much slower the pace was back then, I came across this entry “uninterrupted concentration.” I suppose that wouldn’t have made it to my list unless it was an issue.

Here are a few of the things I still love:

Birds singing in the morning
Hot dogs at the ballgame
Root beer barrels
The sound of a merry-go-round
Words with double letters (Don’t ask me why, but that still holds true. Love ‘em.)
The smell of orange blossoms and jasmine
50’s and 60’s music
A good book
Watching and listening to ocean waves
A true friend

My list is much longer, but these are some of the highlights. Here’s something really funny. Last week I wrote a post about patience and perseverance. Guess what was on my list: “patience and understanding.” I wonder if I meant mine or everyone else’s?

Do you have ten things you can think of off the top of your head that you love? Let me know.

I’ve been recuperating from surgery and, believe me, it takes a lot of perseverance. I long to be 100% better, but recovery comes in small doses. It’s so gradual I can hardly recognize any change from day to day. I wish I could manufacture a little more patience. I admit I’m not known for a high patience quotient. I got to wondering how other people manage to persevere.

Look at this. It came from a blog written by William Biddle

Abraham Lincoln’s perseverance

1816, He had to work to support his family after they were forced out of their home.
1818, His mother died.
1831, Failed in business.
1832, Was defeated for legislature.
1832, Lost his job and couldn’t get into law school.
1833, Declared bankruptcy & spent the next 17 years of his life paying off the money he borrowed from friends to start his business.
1834, Was defeated for legislature again.
1835, Was engaged to be married, but his sweetheart died and his heart was broken.
1836, Had a nervous breakdown and spent the next six months in bed.
1838, Was defeated in becoming the speaker of the state legislature.
1840, Was defeated in becoming elector.
1843, Was defeated for Congress
1846, Was Defeated For Congress.
1848, Was defeated for Congress again.
1849, Was rejected for the job of land officer in his home state.
1854, Was defeated for Senate.
1856, Was defeated for Vice-President — got less than 100 votes.
1858, Was defeated for Senate for the third time.
1860, Was elected president of the United States.

Then there’s Louis Pasteur. He said, “Let me tell you the secret that has led me to my goal. My strength lies solely in my tenacity.”

So, alright. I guess I’ll try to persevere. Here’s one more example of perseverance. I know you’ll enjoy this one.

A small boy is sent to bed by his father. Five minutes later, he calls, “Da-aad.”
“What?”
“I’m thirsty. Can I have a drink of water?”
“No.”
Five minutes later, he calls again. “Da-aaaad.”
“What?”
“I’m thirsty.”
“I told you, no water. If you ask again, I’ll have to spank you.”
Five minutes later. “Da-aaaaaad. When you come in to spank me, can you bring me a drink of water?”

Well, that’s perseverance for you. It comes in all sizes.

If you are following my Chinese Zodiac articles, here are two more. Year of the Snake and Year of the Horse