Category Archives: Elderblog

Things My Mother Told Me

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My mother would say to me,”Don’t spray cologne on your neck.”

Here’s her rationale. The skin under your chin, the “front” of your neck, is thin, delicate skin. It is one of the first places where people show their age. Since the first ingredient in cologne is alcohol, this is NOT a good thing to spray on your neck year after year after year. Her advice–spritz a little to the “back” of your neck, your wrists and the inside of your elbows.

This was another of her favorites.  “Is there any reason why you have to look in the mirror at yourself while you brush your teeth?”

At the time, this seemed a little peevish to me, but I wasn’t the one cleaning off the tiny specks of dried toothpaste off the mirror. I am now. I don’t look into the mirror while brushing anymore.

Here’s another. “Always make sure you have money in your purse.”

Notice she didn’t say a “dime” (which way back when, that’s how much it cost to make a phone call in case of an emergency). She meant “real” money. To this day, I never leave the house with less than $10.00. And I have experienced my share of little emergencies when I was glad I had that money with me. Especially one night after midnight, when I got a flat tire and a good samaritan stopped and changed it for me. I forced that $10.00 on him, he didn’t want to take it, but I had it to give, and at 1:00 a.m. in the morning, I wished it could’ve been more.

She had some kooky ones, too. “Always make your bed in the morning.”

This had to do with one of her many “what if” scenarios. What if you went to work and there was a fire, (The firemen would see my unmade bed?) or what if you forgot something at home and had to send someone to your house to fetch it for you. (They would look through my house mainly to see if my bed was made?) Believe me, she had several more freaky reasons why my bed should me made, but I think she just liked the idea of a home that was always in order. This was her way of scaring me into being orderly.

Evidently, she was not alone with this last piece of motherly advice. I have friends whose mothers told them the same thing. “Always wear clean underwear.”

I will spare you the “what if” scenarios that go along with this one.

Many people recall insightful advice they’ve received from a parent. The young mother over at Verlanderville remembers an admonition from her mother.

Growing up, my mother told us that we were not allowed to use the word hate for things like vegetables, songs, people, etc.  She said that it was a very strong word and that we should only use it for things like sin, injustice, math, etc.

Clearly, dads can give good advice, too. See Mom & A Microphone

It was my 7-year-old’s first flag football game of the season. I was secretly dreading it, since my mother and father were always sitting on the sidelines at Griffin’s games, cheering him on. This year, Dad wouldn’t be there. Dad was Griffin’s biggest fan. Last season, when I expressed concern that I “wasn’t sure this was his strongest sport,” Dad told me, “be patient. He’ll get better with time.” And just like all the other advice my father has given me, he was right.

Makes you smile, doesn’t it?

6 Ways To Beat The Cost Of Groceries

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  1. Don’t throw those leftover veggies in the garbage. Save them in a large container in the freezer. Keep adding to it. Leftover beef and chicken can be collected in the same container. Chop meat into cubes before adding. When the container is full, dump it into a pot of broth (chicken, beef or vegetable). Better still use some low-sodium bouillon cubes. It’s such a healthy meal, you don’t have to feel guilty about serving it with a big loaf of Italian or French bread.
  2. Before you write a single word on your weekly menu-planning list, (You do make a list, don’t you?) check the refrigerator for leftovers. Use the leftovers. Be honest. How many times have you forgotten about them and ended up throwing them away? You will now vow to never to that again!
  3. At the beginning of every week, make your menu list. What exactly are you planning to have for lunch and dinner during the coming week? You’ve already checked the frig, right? Now it’s time to look in the freezer. That’s your starting point. Build a meal around something you already have in the freezer. If it’s meat, all you’ll need are the veggies to go with it. If you have a bag of frozen veggies, decide what meat or fish you will prepare. Or be a vegetarian for a night.
  4. While you decide what will be on your menu planner, you need to have a second list right alongside it. This list is your grocery list. (Maybe you already have one started. I tend to write things down as I use the last one during the week, i.e. eggs, milk, cereal) List everything you will need at the supermarket to complete the meals you are planning to prepare for the coming week. When you walk into the supermarket–stick to the list. You’ll be surprised how much money you’ll save when you enter the store armed with a plan.
  5. If you shop once a week, try shopping every other week. Actually, someone told me to try this, but I didn’t think it would save me any money. Surprise, surprise. It did. I’m not sure how or why, because my bi-weekly shopping list was a whole lot longer than my weekly list, but at the end of the month, I had saved approximately $40.00. I am a family of one, so that’s pretty darn good. [Caution: If you try this, make sure you have enough food in the house to last for two weeks. That’s the tricky part.]
  6. Finally, don’t forget about pasta. It’s inexpensive and filling. When I was growing up, Sunday was always Pasta Day. The beauty of Pasta Day is that there are all kinds of shapes and sizes of pasta to choose from, so it feels like a new meal every week. Switch it out every week: ziti, rigatoni, spaghetti, penne, to name a few. The added bonus–pasta is quick and easy to prepare. [Hint: After draining your pasta in a collander, do not rinse it with water. The outer layer of starch on the pasta is what makes the sauce stick to it. If you rinse–the sauce slides off.]

So, there you have it. Six suggestions–give them a try.

I’m open to any and all suggestions on saving money, so let me know if you have any.

Happiness Is A Walk In The Rain – Spontaneity

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run-in-the-rain.jpg

image from

Last Saturday afternoon, as I was getting ready to walk home from my friend Bev’s house, the clouds shuddered and an unexpected shower of rain began pelting the windows. It sounded good to me. It sounded like bad timing to Bev.

Her immediate thoughts were: maybe I should wait until the rain stopped or slowed down, or I should, at least, borrow an umbrella, or…

But I was thinking, I couldn’t remember the last time I walked in the rain. So, I pooh, poohed the offer of an umbrella and ventured outside. It was a hot day. The rain felt cool. I noticed steam rising from the ground, as the earth drank its full. Huge drops of rain cascaded down from my head. There was no lightning, no thunder–a perfect day for a stroll. I looked up at the sky as I walked and drops of water splattered onto my face. By the time, I reached my front door, I was soaked to the skin. I stepped inside and dropped my clothes.

Spontaneity had surprised me and gifted me with a glorious, divine, magnificent interlude!

From the news stan(d)

Someone’s said that “spontaneity is the quality of being able to do something just because you feel like it at the moment, of trusting your instincts, of taking yourself by surprise…

You don’t think about being spontaneous, you just do it. It comes from within you to do what you like, how you like it and when you want it. It just happens – unplanned, unstructured and best of all, unexpected but still within your power to shape it.

The Cook Family seems to know how to be spontaneous.

The other day Dan got home from work just in time to catch the sun going down . The second he came through the door he said, “grab a blanket, we’re going on the roof.”

This idea tickled me – Manufactured Spontaneity

At Flax, the art supply store, you can buy a notebook with napkins instead of pages. Because so many great ideas started on a napkin. So. You should be ready with some napkins.

Spontaneity–it comes in all sizes.

What about you? Spontaneous or Well Planned Agenda?

2008 Beijing Olympics Opening Ceremony

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08/08/08 A propitious day in China, believed to bring prosperity, and to China’s utter delight, an opportunity to perform for the world–The Olympic Opening Ceremony.

For as long as I can remember, I have loved watching the Olympics. Of course, I enjoy the competitions, but I try real hard to see the Opening Ceremonies. Usually, they are extraordinary, spectacular extravaganzas. And this year, China did not disappoint. Their ceremony left me breathless at times, at other times awed by the precision of the 15,000 people who performed and created one of the most memorable Opening Ceremonies I have ever seen.

The Parade of Nations always makes my eyes water. The magnitude of so many countries coming together, despite their political differences, gives me hope for humanity. When the torch was finally lit, I was emotionally drained.

I’m not alone in my admiration for the spirit of the games. Fitness Diva also loved the Opening.

 I hope that you all got to watch China present the opening ceremonies of the 2008 Beijing Olympics last night or this morning. I have to say, without a doubt, China ROCKED IT!!! I have watched all the Olympics since I was old enough to know what they were, and China’s incredibly spectacular display of pyrotechnics, performance, and purely awe inspiring displays was off the charts. Never has an opening ceremony been as monumentally opulent and magnificent.

See what I mean? When you love them, you really, really love them.

To see some marvelous photos, go to fash eccentric.

Enjoy.


Write a Memoir-Share a Memory

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Every once in a while, I feel the necessity to encourage people to write and record a memory or two. I often suggest this to friends and I receive a variety of responses:
“I’m not a writer.”
“Nothing interesting has happened in my life.”
“No one would be interested in reading anything I could write.”
“I’m uncomfortable revealing incidents from my life.”
“I don’t have the time.”
“I wouldn’t know what to write about.”

I have answers for each of the above. If you know how to talk, you know how to write. Everyone has something interesting and insightful to document for family members to read sometime in the future. And it doesn’t have to be anything too personal. As to having time–if you have time to read or watch television, you can steal a half hour to write. And what to write? Write about anything you think your children or grandchildren might like to know about you. For instance:
Where did you meet your spouse?
When was your first kiss? With who?
What were your parents like?
Tell about your favorite vacation.
What country would you visit if you could?

 Remembering is a good thing. I’m not the only one who thinks so.

This from an article in O Magazine 

Writing memoir is a way to figure out who you used to be and how you got to be who you are.

From Barefoottech in Australia

“When my Father was dying of cancer he started to write about his life. I longed for him to be able to record all of his experiences. Sadly, he only wrote a fraction of it, but I treasure to this day the bit he did accomplish. However, there is so much I wish I could ask, and can’t. Now I’m older I want to know more.”

Whatever memories or knowledge you may have, write them down. Her grandfather was a brilliant gardener, but unfortunately none of his tips were passed on.

In the July/August issue of the AARP magazine, there is an excellent article about memoirs, Everyone Has a Story to Tell. I agree.

Is there any reason why you can’t go out and buy a notebook? If it’s sitting on a table or a desk, maybe you’ll be moved to write something in it.

BlogHer ’08 – Boomers, Bloopers, and Personal Shoppers

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I attended my very first BlogHer Conference this past weekend with my daughter, Catherine. In addition to meeting so many kind and wonderful bloggers, who helped me immensely, particularly Victoria, and gathering more information about blogging than I ever knew existed, I found lots of fun in places I didn’t expect. I even had a private chat with Gina Ravera from The Closer, a favorite program of mine. But there were other things, too.

Did you know the BlogHer attendees had the use of a Macy’s personal shopper? Lisa Stone told me about this shopping privilege the first night I met her and I decided to see what it would feel like to have someone do the walking for me. As it happened, I did need another piece of luggage, so I had Marguerite, my personal shopper, take a look around Macy’s for me. Unfortunately, she couldn’t find what I was looking for, but for 20 short minutes, I had my very own personal shopper.

Then there was my Wii experience. People had been telling me about this new gameware for some months, but I never actually saw one. No more. I had a chance to use Wii at the conference and I must say I did a pretty wicked hula hoop. (When I say wicked, I do not mean it in a good way. I was hopelessly terrible.)

I also had an experience with the Westin Hotel’s electrician. When I returned to my room each evening, I sat in the easy chair to read a book. On Saturday night, the floor lamp wasn’t working, so I called for the electrician. I was already in my nightgown by then, so I wrapped myself in the plush white robe supplied by the hotel. When the electrician arrived carrying a fresh lightbulb, I pointed him to the correct lamp. He looked at it, stooped over and plugged it in. He was good enough not to make any remark as he left. He just smiled and said, “All fixed now.”

My biggest blooper of all happened at the Open Space portion of the conference. I asked a woman if she had enjoyed the conference. She very graciously answered, “Yes.” A few moments later, my daughter informed me that Elisa wasn’t an attendee, she organized the conference. I was talking to Elisa Camahort. (In my defense, she wasn’t wearing a name badge and I hadn’t seen her close up before.)

Catherine and I spent a glorious day on Monday touring with Laurie. The perfect ending to a perfect weekend.

The BlogHer Conference was a real eye-opener for me. I worried that I might feel out of place with all the young bloods, but there was a contingent of Seniors and Boomers in attendance and I was thrilled to make new connections with them. I walked away from the conference invigorated and inspired to create a community for seniors who are blogging. The community is only partially finished, but I’m open for any and all suggestions. Please feel free to join me.

BlogHer ’08 was possibly the best conference I ever attended. Thanks for the memories.

[cross-posted at BlogHer]

10 Ways To Stretch Your Dollar

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These are things I have been doing to ease the pain of high gas prices, high food prices and the devaluation of the dollar.

  1. I’m cooking more and dining out less.
  2. When I do eat out, I go to a restaurant that has a coupon offer. I doggy bag what I can’t eat. Sometimes that doggy bag becomes tomorrow’s lunch.
  3. I’ve begun to use coupons at the supermarket again. I slacked off for a while, but I’m back.
  4. I don’t drive out of my way, but when I can, I purchase gas at Costco. A membership card at any of the warehouse stores has gotten more attractive, even if you don’t have a large family. Share the cost of the card with a friend–even better. Then meet on a Saturday morning and enjoy each other’s company while you shop and gas up.
  5. I’ve always bought name brand items, but I’m giving generics a shot when they’re available.
  6. I’m reading more and looking at less TV. Gone are the days when I have the TV on as background noise. And I remember to close the lights when I leave a room.
  7. I’m only buying things I need. Impulse shopping has come to an abrupt halt. And if it’s not on sale, it’s not in my cart. I’ve also sworn off shopping on the internet and the TV.
  8. I make a special effort not to throw food away. In the past, I’ve forgotten certain foods were in the refrigerator. I’m now keeping an eagle eye on all leftovers. Nothing gets wasted. Every last morsel gets eaten.
  9. I’m shopping less frequently at the supermarket, too. I’ve always loved eating breakfast at dinnertime, and eggs are almost always a staple in my refrigerator. So, I’m eating scrambled eggs and toast in the p.m. again once in a while. Tuna fish is another staple I had been neglecting. I forgot how much I love tuna salad slathered on a crisp hoagie roll with lettuce and mayo. Yum.
  10. And lastly, I set my air conditioning a few degrees higher this summer. It’s still more comfortable inside than outside. You’d be surprised how much you save this way. As an added bonus, lowering that thermostat conserves energy overall.

Some of these things, I’ve always done. I started as a youngster, because my mother insisted on most of these conservation rules. Even when gas prices were $.50 a gallon, my mom was plotting her shopping course, never backtracking, always hitting her errands on a pre-ordained route. Consequently, I’ve always done that myself.

Jeez, do you believe gas was ever $.50 a gallon?

Do you have any other ideas I can use to stretch my dollar?

Text Messaging Is Bad, I Think, Maybe

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I don’t text message. What I mean is, I don’t send them and I don’t receive them because I don’t use a cell phone. I don’t own one,  I don’t want one, and I hope I never have to rely on one. That said, I do understand why people feel they need to have one.

It’s been a boon to parents, allowing them to keep tabs on the whereabouts of their young children. (I understand that, but my children are grown now.)

If you work in any type of service position, the cell phone allows your customers/clients to reach you 24/7. (I only partially understand this one, since the only persons that really must be on-call at all times are doctors, and even they employ professionals to screen their calls.)

Then there is a more recent phenomenon. People are exchanging their landlines for cell phones. It’s no longer cost effective to pay for both. (I understand this one, too, although I have chosen my landline over a cell phone.)

But this post isn’t about cell phones, it is about the brain-cell-devouring, punctuationless abbreviations that go hand in hand with text messaging. Anyone who is a lover of words, as I am, cannot help feeling threatened by this newest polyglot of hideous jargon.

Last week a friend of mine handed me her cell phone and said, “Read this cute message I received from my son.”

I could barely decipher what it said. Not only that, my stomach started to ache and if the message had been a little longer, I probably would’ve doubled over and retched. Don’t get me wrong. It was a cutesy message, but the lack of punctuation, and the insertion of unfamiliar abbreviations made my head spin.

It got me to thinking about an English professor I had many years ago. One day upon entering the classroom and before returning graded papers to the class, he said, “This is a sorry batch of essays. I have taken off for spelling mistakes and all grammatical errors. It’s most unfortunate because some of your stories were actually commendable, but as for the rest…”

If he thought those papers were atrocious, I hate to think about the papers he would receive today from kids who have spent years writing shorthand sentences because that is the most expedient method used when text messaging.

One other thing that puzzles me. If you’re holding a cell phone in your hand, people, why are you text messaging? Make the call, connect with your friends, and leave the precious English language intact.

[For those who are interested in Astrology, I’ve finished the Chinese Zodiac articles over at LifeScript.com. The last in my series was Year of the Pig. I’ll be starting a series of articles on the Sun Signs. You might enjoy reading the first one, Aries Woman .]

Remembering George Carlin

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I loved George Carlin. Even when I didn’t agree with what he was saying, he could make me double over and laugh my head off. A lot of things he pointed out tickled my funny bone.

Politics especially got his juices flowing. Some of his famous political one liners include:

“In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.”

“Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.”

And this silly one – “George Washington brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.”

But George had a much more serious side when it came to politics and government. On lobbyists from The Nation

“The real owners are the big wealthy business interests that control things and make all the important decisions. Forget the politicians, they’re an irrelevancy. The politicians are put there to give you the idea that you have freedom of choice. You don’t. You have no choice. You have owners. They own you. They own everything. They own all the important land. They own and control the corporations. They’ve long since bought and paid for the Senate, the Congress, the statehouses, the city halls. They’ve got the judges in their back pockets. And they own all the big media companies, so that they control just about all of the news and information you hear. They’ve got you by the balls. They spend billions of dollars every year lobbying – lobbying to get what they want. Well, we know what they want; they want more for themselves and less for everybody else,” ranted the comedian whose routines were studied in graduate schools.

On Obama from salon.com

And I’m very excited, for the sake of itself, for this Obama story. It’s very wonderful to watch and to follow and to read, because it is so different from what America has allowed itself to do. And I don’t know that it goes anywhere, and I’m not investing in it, but I do enjoy witnessing it. I think it’s a very exciting story.

Asked about the right and the left in comedy–A.V.Club

Do you think it’s possible to be truly funny from a position of power? For instance, Dennis Miller, who’s always been a smart, funny comedian, has undergone a political conversion over the past decade, and now his comedy is rooted in his support of the Bush administration. And he seems less funny.GC:

For some reason, there aren’t as many right-wing comedians as there are left or center or non-political. I read something about this recently that made sense, and I’ve forgotten what it said, of course. I have great respect for Dennis Miller’s mind and ability as a comedian, but I agree that I am not as personally entertained by his new material, which you describe as “coming from a position of power.” Of course, he always did come from a position of presumed superiority, and I don’t necessarily say that pejoratively. He did come from what appeared to be a smartass, superior platform. That’s part of what made him work as a stand-up.

As an all around comedian, George is up there with the greats. Local 6.com reports that Carlin will be awarded the Mark Twain Comedy Prize this November.

 The John F. Kennedy Center for the Performing Arts said that Carlin will be honored for his 50-year career as a Grammy-winning standup comedian, writer and actor.

The chairman of the Kennedy Center, Stephen Schwarzman, complimented Carlin as a comedian who can make people laugh and also make them think.

In reading the various articles that have been written about George since his death, I was surprised that the last vote he cast was for George McGovern. He never voted again after that election. I suppose he didn’t think one vote counted for much. That’s a pity. I consider my vote one of the greatest freedoms America offers. Even on my most cynical days, I am grateful for it.

I will miss George. Not too many people have the ability to make me laugh till tears stream down my face. Now there will be one less.

Things I Hate

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Since I wrote all about things that I love last week, it seems only fair that I write about a few things I hated in the 80’s and still hate in 2008. As in my previous post, some of the things on my old list are outdated. For instance, back then I hated “window envelopes.” I don’t have a problem with them anymore because I pay the majority of my bills online. I also didn’t like to “clean the oven,” and thank goodness that has changed. I have a self-cleaning oven.

Following are still problem areas–things that I hate:

Toilet paper installed backward on the dispenser
Stupid TV commercials
Guests that arrive late for a sit-down dinner
Any kind of cruelty or abuse
Mixing ground beef with my hands (yuk!)
Golf (Sorry, golfers, but I just don’t get it.)
Hate when my feet are cold
Polkas
Advertising cards stuck inside a magazine
Bugs, mice and snakes

Well, that’s it for me. If you need to vent, send me your list.